you’re maybe washing the dishes of your store, or sitting beside the windows listening to an intense hour and a half of pure calculus discussion, or you may just be walking along the side of a street alone.

you’re scrubbing the surfaces of the plates or hearing the voice of your instructor: “the limit, when it crosses the value of 2… ” or watching that you don’t bump into a pole or to anyone for that matter.

then, something suddenly catches your attention. just simple details that you don’t normally notice in your “busy life”. bubbles you’ve created from soap and water, a gust of wind blowing the sides of your face, or a falling leaf, well… falling.

you stare into space numbingly. and without much thought and apprehension, a moment, a happy one fills your mind, carelessly. the time when you were savorly gobbling up all the ice cream and cakes you greedily succumbed to during noche buena together with your cousins and ninongs and ninangs. time when you, without any hassle, aced an exam and you didn’t even study that much. or inventing a concoction, an alcoholic beverage you and your friends mixed with some powdered juice you stupidly thought of probably because you didn’t have anything better to do since you were all slightly drunk.

you start to recall every passing detail of every situation. you try to look back and visualize on who did, said or gave what. after getting the whole idea and vividly seeing the picture, you smile and let out a silent laugh. then that laugh, doesn’t become silent anymore. people might think you’ve gone loco, but you don’t care. unmindful of the distractions around, you completely stare into abyss; a blank space, of a shared memory, a cherished yesterday.

after consciousness gets the better of you, you’ve realized it was just a relished past. your eyes, though tired, are back on track. you continue what you were supposed to be doing in the first place. but the smile on your face, you could not make it disappear quickly.

washing the glasses now of your store, paying attention to the explanation of a trick question: “if the units are not equal, the limit does not exist…” or noticing that you’ve already reached your destination.

the smile becomes an unrequited grin. you sigh, out of sheer expression. you pause for a second and laugh, and smile again. it’s just another one of those daydreams, already done and through, but still alive in your mind and heart. only a memory that’s already concluded, but never forgotten.

posted Friday, 26 November 2004

test 1: 9 questions

“I want to say one thing to the American people, I’m going to say this again. I did not have sexual relations with that woman, Miss Lewinsky. I never told anybody to lie. Not a single time. Never. These allegations are false and I need to go back to work for the American people.”

wrong! okay, so sometimes i like to be the center of attention but im not a social chameleon. im actually shy (with innocent-puppy-dog-eyes look), but once you get to know me better, that’s the time i get down to business. lol.

test 2: 18 questions

“When a poor person dies of hunger, it has not happened because God did not take care of him or her.
It has happened because neither you nor I wanted to give that person what he or she needed.”

people-loving, period. don’t include the dwarf in there. don’t make me feel shorter than i already am (nix, insert contradiction! hehe). i just love to give. but i’m no santa claus! so sorry to those who have wishlists. lol.

test 3: 27 questions

“Common looking people are the best in the world: that is the reason the Lord makes so many of them.”

that’s why i’m practicing to be bad. madaling mamatay ang mabait. hehe. but yeah, i hate war. i like to believe that people should settle their differences by talking it out. what’s the sense of fighting over someting without even knowing what you or the opposition’s fighting for?

test 4: 45 questions

“Live simply that others may simply live”

i’m a do gooder, no hidden agendas or indecent proposals. hehe. i may have to start a spiritual organization. nah. “all that we need is, give peace a chance…”

posted Wednesday, 15 December 2004

ST. PAUL COLLEGE UNIVERSITY OF DUMAGUETE

.highway, just a two-way lane.

.where i usually walk (more like run) when going to the highschool department early in the morning. was standing at a friend’s house when i took this shot. just a stone’s throw away from school, no wonder she’s always late. (haha. peace!).

.am welcomed after all.

.should see this at night. looks like a memorial park.

.don’t really like this shot.

.much more this. damn shadow.

.had a mini-tour here. so cool, coz it’s like a tiny museum of memories. of how this school became it as is.

.was a wooden bridge before.

.post-centennial celebration. the week before i shot this, t’was a crowded place packed with the school’s alumni and etc., and i wasn’t there.

.haha, they tried to grow some bermuda grass on the field. on a school ground? people step on it! sheesh.

.multi-purpose hall.

.St. Luke, my section .front of our classroom, now it looks like a jungle.

.girl’s dorm, where nix sleeps (rarely… party animal! haha. peace) when she was still a junior.

.back of the highschool building. more importantly where i spent most of the time with my co-COCS trainees crawling, doing push-ups and eating dust and sulking up to our officer’s rantings and ramblings when it’s formation time.

.function hall.

.this a school? looks like a forest to me. lots of trees means lots of mosquitoes. mosquitoes means dengue. -enough-

.most favorite. so peaceful.

had a somewhat hard time with the pics, positioning myself and all. haha. good thing my background’s black. well, after walking back and forth, i’ve realized that it really wasn’t the same as before. the trip was also just a something to push me forward. it wasn’t as it used to be. the magic was gone. coz instead, another kind emerged.

was amazed of the awesome changes of this school. a lot had been improved. that’s because of the centennial celebration that happened. i mean it’s only a hundred years. am just sour-graping since we were the last batch that graduated with the word “college” still in our diplomas. after that, everything gradually upgraded. everything was new. now who wouldn’t get jealous of that? bah humbug. (is the spelling right?). welpz… change is inevitable. life must go on. good day or night!

posted Wednesday, 10 November 2004

“goodbyes are tough, but they make the next hellos so much sweeter. ;)”
—cnb

was so glad that i was able to go back to dumaguete. but i didn’t want to tell anyone until i was actually there coz maybe our plan wouldn’t push through. when it did, and we were already in a 2 and a half hour v-hire ride, i couldn’t fight the urge of texting some special friends about it. sad to say at that time, there was no signal. bummer. i couldn’t conceal the excitement i was feeling. only to find out that i forgot to take some pills to help me get the nauseousness inside my head and stomach out coz i get sick easily when it comes to road trips especially in airconditoned vehicles. or are these pills just placebos to fool the mind? added to the fact that my seatmates were a Japanese father (who kept answering his phone with me laughing everytime i here him say:”Mushi, mushi?” -reminded me of the Mtv ad-). And the one on my left was big, BIG brother whose arm was rested on shoulders (felt like i was supporting an infant). anyway, rode a 30 minute-ride pump boat to get to Sibulan (i think 5-7 km from Dumaguete).

now why the sudden travel? aside from wanting to catch up on friends, we had to process some requirements of my younger siblings’ Form 137 coz our situation regarding our school’s transcript of records is a whole lot of mess. and to also bring some tools my father ordered for. multi-tasking, when you put it in another way.

being in st. paul again, i went back to memory lane, and forgive me if you’ve had enough of my “reminiscing” state. since it was still their semestral break, sort of had the school all by myself which made it even better, though there were a bunch of enrolees. anyway, i’ll blog about this after since the pictures are too many that i can’t seem to accomodate them in this entry.

called my friends after in which one of them offerred us to stay in a spare room for rent out of there house; for free of course. and since i’m a thick-faced candid maniac, we took it. and i only have kind words to my alter-ego and her family, thanks! thanks a million!

t’was already 5pm or so when rolica and xyra (got acquainted through Friendster which i haven’t opened for a month, but recently did coz i wanted to see some pics) arrived. went to their friend who was in a salon while rolica and i, stayed outside.
called the b-day boy omar and luckily circee was their too. we met up and exchanged how are you’s. they wondered how long i was going to stay there. told them that i’d be leaving the next day, lunch time. asked me if it would be possible to move it to midnight since he’ll be celebrating it on that day. well, we strolled in silliman and talked about how many were already pregnant in our batch, in which i said, i need not be surpised coz it’s already a normal thing. they just did it ahead which makes the difference; sex, i mean. nice to have those simple yet with sense conversations i’ve had when i was still here.

went to Scooby’s (a fastfood joint) after bidding goodbye to the b-day boy. were there sitting until a girl passed by the glass panel of the store. called out her name and indeed, it was gale! boy did we make a scene there coz of our hellos. haha. chatted, again. seemed like everything was going fine. loved that i was able to see and be with them, again.

had a prayer meeting which rolica (who invited me). walked along the boulevard while making a stir among the people we passed by since we did some more snapshots. boulevard is very beautiful especially at night.

was late in attending the meeting, but it’s better than never. had some funny moments too at the lobby of the hotel.

next stop was City Burger (a kamayan restaurant). we had to fetch my alter-ego back at their house. when we got back though, gale and circee who ordered (Note:ordered) ahead, already gobbled up their plates. funny how they described that they couldn’t resist eating ahead coz they were so hungry already. joined them and we laughed our hearts out of our shallow conversations. funny movies (feng shui included) and answers of contestants in a noon-time show:

“Circee”

Host: Ano ang pambansang ibon?
Contestant 1: Philippine Eagle!

Host: Mali! Ang huling letra nito ay ‘A’.

Contestant 2: —thinks hard—

: Philippine Agila!

Host: Hindi! Nagsisimula ito sa letrang ‘M’.

Contestant 3: Manok!

Host: Mali!
Contestant 4: —thinks that it must be a trick question—
: Pritong Manok!

Host: Ano ba toh? Ba’t naging pritong manok? Sinabing ‘A’ ang huling letra!
Contestant 5: —looks excited as if he knows the answer—
: Manoka!

it may not sound funny, heck it may look corny, but it’s hard to tell the tonation of the one speaking and where the punch lines go, still, bear with me and i hope you got it. speaking of
manok, we were famished with what we ate and we still weren’t through with our talking. unfortunately, the store turned some of the lights off, signaling that it was time for them to close. checked the time, t’was 20 minutes after 10 (damn, whatever happened to:”no need to worry about curfews coz we were of legal age already?) but before you can say that we’re heartless young teenagers not giving a care in the world just to satisfy our thirst for fun, we did understand them and that we left.

after, mr. pessy and ms. opty went home to sleep, in their respective rooms, i mean. woke up, took a bath and got dressed. went out and walked for a little more than 60 meters on the road, with the sky still dark. passed by a bakeshoppe and bought some water. and when i checked at the time… 2:15 *whappak!* (got this one from the highwayman hehe). thought that it was around 4:30 to 5. i don’t have problems regarding sleep and though my body ached for it, i found a hard time shutting my eyes back.

called my father and asked if i could push my departure 12 hours more:

me: pa, edcel ito.
father: kumusta yung pinapagawa ko?
me: may problema pa kasi wala pa yung principal. mmmm… pa… yang…
father: ano?
me: pwedeng… mamaya na lang kami uuwi? sa last trip na?
father: ok.

i didn’t have to kneel and beg! haha… my parents are cool! mind you, they’re also cautious. maybe they knew how much i wanted to extend my stay there. or there must be some force. a strong force. hehe.

sun rose, 7 am, joined stephanie to school. silliman is quite big when you’re there. i don’t know if UP-Dilliman’s bigger or not (and i think it is, you can’t find ikot and toki jeeps here). it’s a 14-hectare lot, i think (just heard it somewhere). what’s cool is that it’s very liberating walking there along the hallways. nobody cares about each other that much, totally differrent from a catholic school. independency is its icing.

was lunch when i got the 1st batch of pictures developed. logged in an internet rental and guess who saw them first??? miss changing lanes did. nah, haven’t got them scanned yet. since there was a webcam available so that’s probably it. hehe. looked silly holding and positioning the pics to the cam on my left hand, and typing on the keyboard on my right.

met up with gale and alyson at three at the library. did a little drama just to get in since they don’t allow outsiders to enter unless they pay a minimum amount. luckily, their was a tour going on by batch. tried to fit in and squeezed in the middle and blend. it was kinda hard becoz i looked too obvious, was the only one white there (honest!). but relieved that i got in! my impression of an ignorant-looking stranger was pretty believable, don’t you think? haha.

got out and met with omar again and sat along the benches. underneath the warm radiance of the sky, the soft breeze of the wind, and huge green trees as my view; wondering when their leaves will begin to fall (a personal trademark that reminds me of this gentle place.) -sigh-. caught up with karl ed, the self-baptized “chickskiller”. hehe.

went to Evermall. call it whatever you want but it didn’t look like a mall to me. and dumaguete doesn’t need one too. coz the environment’s simplified. no need to make it sophisticated. but sometimes we do need some change. anyhows, i remembered a conversation about it:

“sometime before”

me: rol, musta dgte.?

rolica: ok lang. may mall na.

me: ows?

rolica: Evermall. at may tagline pa ako.

me: ano?

rolica: Evermall, the smallest mall… EVER!

“on ym”

me: nuke, just got back from dgte.

nix: what’s new?

me: may mall na.

nix: what? Ever?

me: yup.

nix: what does it look like?

me: ok lang. looked like a hallway… hallway na may aircon.ate at chowking. only i don’t have any pictures i can post, coz somehow, the most stupid thing happened. i lost the film. so stupid of me. ‘nak ng… well, no time to go crazy, i’ll get over it… someday. back to what happened: after eating, we thought we didn’t have anything else to do. only to find out a parked kalesa afront. we rode of course. and it’s a first time for me too. ah, so many things happened when i was there. good, clean fun. spending it with the people that matter most to me. although we did feel sorry for the horse who kept pulling and pulling while us making our own parade downtown.

after riding the
kalesa, t’was time for goodbye. we separated ways already. but had to go to stephie’s house to thank her mom. besides, i had to get her home. rode a tricycle and went back to boulevard, waited for awhile, then departed. and went home.

was happy. had the time of my life, even for a while. and even though there wasn’t an instance when all of us, ALL were together (everybody had some commitments), was still thankful that i was able to spend time with them, especially since they had classes those days and they too had to live, they were able to stop by and say hi. and i’m forever in gratitude. another memory made to last, with good ol’ friends and same ol’ happenings.

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asked most of my friends if i can post their faces here in my blog. kept on saying too that it was just the net that i’m going to put them in. but none of them even bothered to think twice and that i can put as many pics as i want. and look at me trying to hide my identity. hehe

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by the way, don’t you just hate it that when you’re about to end and you’re just trying to edit and add the finishing touches of you’re long entry (particularly this kind), the computer suddenly goes bonkers. and after checking it again, you found out that you’ve only saved half of it??? had to retype most of it. shoot.

posted Friday, 5 November 2004